This is why I do it: little kids figuring out how to show someone they care, and seniors feeling it when they do.
Shirley lives at one of the senior communities where I deliver letters. Some facilities prefer that I leave the letters at the front desk, so residents can grab one whenever they need something to brighten their day. I was dropping off a new stack when Shirley stopped me. “Do you bring the letters?”
When I said yes, she told me how much they mean to her. She gets so excited when there's a new stack waiting.
Then she held up the letter she got to show me. A child who had never met her had drawn a girl at the beach in crayon, and it made her smile.
I didn't know Shirley before I walked in that day. I still think about her.
When I started Sending Grace, I thought I'd be the one giving something to the seniors I visited. Coach gave me so much more.
He was a World War II Navy veteran living at a care facility I visit, and one of the funniest, kindest, warmest people I've ever met. He's right up there with my own grandpa, who will always be number one. Coach loved football, and his stories from the Navy were incredible. I could have listened to him all afternoon. And he loved to joke with me about my dad being a Marine.
Every visit, I introduced myself again. And every time we watched a game together, he'd figure out pretty quickly that the cheerleader sitting next to him didn't understand the plays. Every time, he'd laugh like it was the funniest thing he'd ever heard. To be fair, he wasn't wrong. Then he'd explain them to me all over again.
When the care facility let me know Coach had passed away, I cried. It wasn't the first time I'd lost someone I'd gotten to know on my visits, but this one hit especially hard. I'd lost a friend, and we'd never get to watch one more game. My heart is heavy, but it's also full of gratitude. It was an honor to spend even a small amount of time with him on Saturdays.
Thank you, Coach, for teaching me so much more than football. I think of you every time a game comes on. 🤍
I bring letters to multiple care facilities across the South Bay. At some, I drop them off at the front desk. At others, I get to stay and visit.
Most of the time, I don't take pictures. Some moments stay just between me and the person I was with, and I think that's how it should be. But I wanted to show what these visits are like, so one Saturday I asked a friend to come along and take a few.
So many of the people I meet have incredible stories, and they're just waiting for someone to listen. Sometimes I bring a letter and we just sit together. Other times the letter sparks something, and we end up talking about everything and nothing until it's time to go.
Dennis was at a seniors' computer class at the local library. His letter came from a little friend he's never met. Their favorite thing? Art, “because it's pretty.” What makes them happy? Watching their iPad and eating ice cream.
Dennis couldn't believe it was for him, or that he got to keep it. When he held it up, he couldn't stop smiling. He had walked to the library that day, and he walked home with a little extra spring in his step.
That smile is why I keep doing this.
He was four, in a Dodgers hat that was almost too big for him. His favorite animal is a tiger, and if he could have any superpower, he'd turn into one. His favorite color is blue, so when it was time to draw something that makes him smile, he drew the ocean.
When he finished, he held it up with both arms stretched all the way out, the letter covering his whole face.
Sometimes the things kids say stop me in my tracks.
During one classroom visit, a little boy came up to me after the other kids had started writing. He asked if he could send his letter to his grandma in heaven.
I told him yes, of course.
By the end of the visit, he had decided to give his letter to me instead, so I could bring it to a grandma here on earth. He said his grandma in heaven would like that.
That’s so much love for such a little kid to carry. I hope he felt a little closer to her that day.
I reached out to author Hayley Rocco after reading her picture book, How to Send a Hug, about a girl who sends handwritten letters to her grandma. It felt like she had written it about me. Hayley was warm and generous, and we did a Zoom together to talk about letters and why connection matters.
Then her husband, illustrator John Rocco, sent this: a girl under a Sending Grace mailbox, hugging a goose, with letters in the grass. It's a personalized version of the cover of How to Send a Hug.
"My son loved having Grace come to his classroom. He spent the whole afternoon trying to get everyone in our family to say the word grace without smiling. It really is hard!"
Erica, parent
If you've hosted a Sending Grace visit or received a letter, I'd love to hear what it meant to you. With your permission, I may share it here.
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